Nine Month Abstinence
by Cerulean PenFoil
Summary: Beer.Gillian Maria's life revolved on it.Under doctor's orders, and nine months without it, she swears someone will be losing a piano. Fem!PruxAustria,AU.


**A/N: **First off, this is **AU. **And also Fem!PrussiaxAustria. Human names used, although I had to alter Gilbert's name to a nyotalia one… This thing began when my friend and I were reading books in the library, and she happened to be reading a book on maternal health care.

**Disclaimer:** I do not own Axis Powers Hetalia, and all the characters involved.

* * *

><p>One of these days, that piano-loving priss would be getting what he rightfully deserves. Yes, one of these days he would surely regret knocking her awesome self up like this!<p>

Gillian Maria fumed as she made her way to the piano room. She was met with the sight of Roderich at the piano while staring blankly at the sheet music. So lost in thought was he that he did not notice her presence. Good, perhaps she should leave him to think things over, or better yet, think of ways to save his dearest piano's life. She would make sure it wouldn't make it past the next seven excruciatingly long, painful, beer-free months that she would carry the aristocratic idiot's child.

Two months. They learned quite recently, just the other day really, that she was already two months pregnant. The moment morning sickness became a near-everyday occurrence, Roderich noticed something was wrong and scheduled for a check-up. A check-up which Maria instantly regretted. Hell, Roderich even informed her brother, Ludwig about everything. And now she deemed everyone were traitors as long they listened to anything Roderich said.

Oh she was sure that visits to her brother's house would be different, and so would visits to her friends' houses in the near future. Oh how she regretted that fucking check-up, how she hated that fucking doctor who ruined her life by announcing the scan and test results, and finally how she absolutely hated Roderich for being his usual self: a complete idiot.

* * *

><p>Roderich held her hand in worry as they waited to hear what the kindly old doctor had to say. Maria wanted everything to end quickly, she was eager to crash at Francis's house for a good drink, Roderich was just overreacting to her conditions. Ever since she had agreed to marry the priss; and she wondered why she even did in the first place, Maria had been subjected to a new side of the piano-loving jerk. Yes, she was well aware how he could be quite a loving, adorable sap but sometimes he really could take it too far by being quite the worrywart. He reminded her of her little brother and his extremely OCD, over-the-top tendencies.<p>

"Well, Mrs. Edelstein," the doctor began, and Maria raised an eyebrow at him. Damn, she could never get used to being called 'Mrs' and 'Edelstein' in the same sentence. It just didn't sound as awesome as her old name! Gillian Maria_ Beilschmidt _sounded way more awesome than _Edelstein_! Okay, so she was beginning to drift away; the doctor calling for her attention once more.

"Congratulations, Mrs. Edelstein, you're pregnant. Well along two months, actually." the silence suddenly felt suffocating. Maria just stared in stunned silence at the smiling doctor whose face was like that of a child on Christmas Eve. Roderich was slightly gaping in surprise, his glasses starting to slide down the bridge of his nose. Could it really be happening? Her awesomeness was at stake here, the spineless priss managed to get her pregnant that quick? Maria willed herself not to faint, fainting was definitely not awesome at the moment, so she straightened up in her seat and fixed a glare at the doctor.

"Are you sure you didn't misread the results, Doc? Or perhaps you got the wrong file?" It took all her willpower not to shriek in desperation. Although she did not object to the thought of being a mother someday and bearing children as awesome as she was, Maria berated herself internally that this time was perhaps the worst time _ever_. Heck, she wasn't ready to part with the last bit of her freedom just yet! "No ma'am. The results are perfectly accurate. And as new parents, I'm sure you'll be expecting a lot of things," Yes, like beating up a certain _someone_ when we get home, thought Maria as she plastered a lopsided smile on her face and faced her husband. Roderich had not yet really gotten over his surprise, the dazed expression on his face told Maria all. Was he excited at the prospect of having this baby, and so _soon_?

"I know you have a lot of questions to ask, but the most important thing at the moment would be ensuring the health of your growing baby." "And what does that entail, Doctor? I am aware that there is a lot of preparation during the entirety of nine months, but what else must be done?" "Take good care of yourself, Mrs. Edelstein. Make sure you eat the right food, healthy food. Don't stress or overwork yourself. Make sure to get enough rest, take life slowly and relax. Your moods will fluctuate frequently during pregnancy, so I advise you to have a good mood more often, if possible." Che, that could be remedied. That was one of the main reasons why she married the aristocrat after all, annoying him always brightened her mood without fail.

Roderich was taking every word in, as if he was the one pregnant and not her! The moment they'd get home, Maria would bet he'd begin implementing everything the doctor said. And that would mean he'd be babying her too. Maria could still hear the doctor spouting a list of necessary precautions and something or the other about what consisted a healthy diet. "-of course, no smoking, and no drinking of any alcoholic beverage." Wait, what?

Gillian Maria's head snapped back to questioningly stare at the doctor. "Did I hear that right? No alcohol…at all?" She was sure her voice had not hitched an octave higher. No, no, her voice was perfectly calm, normal. Relax, Gil. You're hearing it wrong. "As in, no beer?" The doctor's smile never faltered as he nodded and replied in the affirmative, "Yes, Mrs. Edelstein. No alcoholic drink whatsoever. No beer, rum, wine vodka. Absolutely no alcohol." "For nine months?" "Yes. For the entirety of your pregnancy." And suddenly, fainting seemed like the most awesome thing to do at the moment as Maria could feel herself collapsing right then and there.

"Since when did you grow stronger, Roddy? I swear you work out behind my back recently, these arms only had the strength to play Chopin the last time I checked!" Maria slurred through the haze in her vision as she came to moments later, Roderich holding her in his arms with a worried frown. "Don't scare us like that, fool. At least give us a warning when you want to acquaint yourself with the doctor's carpet." Roderich lightly scolded, although his was a more worried tone than an angry one. Maria however, ignored it entirely and snapped back, "Idiot! I wasn't. I just heard what could possibly be the most horrible news!" Turning to face the doctor, who she noticed looked a bit worried too, she tried to confirm everything clearly. "Nine fucking long months, eh? B-but Doc, you serious? Can't I drink even a mug of beer? Even a little bit?"

"I am serious, Mrs. Edelstein. Smoking, drugs, and alcohol can harm the developing baby inside of you, and things might become complicated if you continue your drinking habits. I suggest a complete abstinence from those stuff until the baby is born. If you'd like to ensure the very best and give birth to a healthy baby, do take my advice. No alcohol." The solemn expression on the doctor's face only heightened her greatest fears.

* * *

><p>Gillian Maria did not remember anything else after that. She did not even remember the awfully silent trip back home nor the hesitant gestures of comfort her husband gave her. No, all she knew was that she was going to <em>die<em>.

And that was how she ended up contemplating on what her life would be like. Did nobody understand that beer was her life? As she lay on the couch in the living room while Roderich told Ludwig everything over the phone, Maria felt all energy sapped from her. To hell with the 'relax and be happy' mood; one of the most tragic things had befallen her life: Loss of fine beer for the rest of her pregnancy.

Stupid, stupid…and whose fault was all of this? Her piercing crimson eyes zoned in on her husband, still on the phone with her brother and probably warning him to never allow her even a drop of beer if ever she'd drop by. She had to admit though that she sometimes found it the _tiniest_ bit adorable that Roderich would want the best for her, but this simply would not do…oh hell, he was going to pay!

A firm yet gentle nudge on her shoulder jolted Maria back to consciousness. She had no idea when and how long she had been dozing off on the couch. Roderich looked down at her calmly, a small cup of tea in one hand, the other hand caressing her silver locks. "Here, drink this." Maria peered at it suspiciously before raising an eyebrow at the bespectacled man, "What the fuck is this? One of your sissy tea for piano-playing aristocrats?" "Ginger tea. This might help with your bouts of nausea."

"You do know the doctor mentioned tea at one point. Even your tea is on the 'Prohibited Food and Drink for the Awesome Pregnant Me' list! You deny me my beer and yet poison me with this?" Roderich merely rolled his eyes at her, quite used to her rants. "I never said this would substitute your beer, Gillian. I know you're still sore about that." he murmured, taking in the way her eyes seemed to darken at his words.

"Now don't give me that look, dear. It's obviously the doctor who ordered that beer and all forms of alcohol be removed from your diet. You wouldn't want to give birth to a baby suffering from fetal alcohols syndrome, _do you_?" Roderich knew he was treading on thin ice by trying to save himself from his wife's withering death glare.

He didn't know whether to be worried or relieved when the glare was replaced by a radiant smile. Really, perhaps the erratic mood swings that the doctor mentioned was something to be marveled at. His wife looked so happy all of a sudden, _too_ happy for his liking either that he had the feeling something was terribly _wrong_. "You're right, Roddy. I definitely won't allow my baby to be born ugly and un-awesome! So yeah, I can't take my anger out at the kid because I'm too awesome to hurt myself…but you do know whose fault this is in the first place right?"

Roderich tilted his glasses higher as he felt beads of sweat trickle down his brow. The unholy gleam in Gillian's eyes were far worse than those of Elizaveta's during her periods. Slowly, he began backing away from his wife, his hands up in a placating gesture. "Gillian, dearest, relax and stay calm, okay? You need to ensure the baby's health, yes?"

"Fine, fine! I ensure the baby's health and safety, Specs, while you…"she grinned at him as she took a step forward for every step he took backward, "try ensure your beloved piano's safety." At this, her husband froze and she could not help but relish at the sight of his horrified features. "Gillian Maria! What has my piano have to do with this?" he all but wailed in an undignified manner. Sure, he'd be fine with his wife taking it out on him, but not on his piano! he loved his piano just as much as he loved her, and he could not choose between both.

His piano was pure and innocent, although the voice at the corner of his mind screamed at him that it was where he had gotten her pregnant after all, but that was beside the point! Gillian was plotting something against him involving his piano! "All this is your fault, Specs! To hell if I knew that you fucking me on that piano would get me pregnant early, and thus forcing me to part with my beer for the next seven months! Since I cannot get rid of your baby, well it's also my baby, then I'll just have to get rid of your _other_ baby, your damn piano."

Roderich shrank back a little as his wife cackled maniacally before disappearing into their room. He decided right then and there that hell hath no fury like a pregnant Gillian Maria without her beer. A sigh escaping his lips, Roderich ran a hand through his hair as he sank to the floor. He warily eyed the room where she had disappeared in and resigned himself to his fate. Yes it might as well be his fault, and now he had to endure seven painfully long months. Perhaps he'd take up the offer of visiting Ludwig and helping him rid his house of beer before Gillian decided to drop by.

But first things first, Roderich noted as he scrambled back up on his feet and headed to the music room. He had to find a way to protect his darling piano for the next seven months. "God, please have mercy and deliver my piano from the harm that is my wife."

* * *

><p><strong>Omake<strong>: Roderich found Maria sprawled out on the living room couch a few hours later. It was unusual to see her still and quiet for once. Perhaps the alcohol ban affected her too much. After all, how would he feel if he was banned from music for a span of night months? Determined to cheer her up and return her to her normally boisterous spirits, if only a bit, Roderich sidled next to her and slowly reached out to stroke her silver hair.

"Gil, stop sulking. I'll make it up to you after the baby is born. You can go on a drinking spree with your friends all you like, but not now while you're still pregnant."

"I know, do I look like I'm still sulking? If you think I do, you should get your eyes checked again."

A smirk in his direction told Roderich that she was faring better now.

"Hey, Rod," Maria shifted her position so that she faced him fully now, "Yes, what is it?"

"Can I name the baby after a bottle of Schnapps?"

"G-Gillian Maria...Get that horrifying thought out of your head!"

* * *

><p><strong>AN:** I hope you guys liked it. Again, please do review!

**Update:** I'm wondering if I should do a continuation of this. I have plans for what might ensue for the rest of the pregnancy, but I'm not sure if I can pull off a good storyline (simply because I need to research more. Again.) Anyway, making this a multi-chaptered fic is just a plan, so if anyone wants that to happen, at least express that in your reviews and I'll see if I can work it out. (I thank everyone who added this story to their Favorites list.)

**Update 9.10.11 - **To all those who expressed their desire for a sequel, I'm posting the first chapter up under the title 'Maria's a Saint'. (Don't ask why, that's the only title that I could come up with.) I hope you enjoy~!


End file.
